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Biography

I am the dictator of a small island nation by day and a jello mold designer by night.

OK, that's not true, but there really isn't much to say that isn't covered by the one-line biography. I'm nearly 40, I'm divorced, I have two kids. I don't have time or energy for exotic hobbies like parasailing or I wouldn't spend so much time updating a weblog, would I?

I knit somewhat obsessively. It keeps me from worrying about other things, and believe me, there are always a few to worry about.

100 Things About Me:
1. I'm 41.
2. I have two children, the Girl is 19 and the Boy is 8.
3. My daughter was an immaculate conception. (Questions will not be taken on this one, thanks.)
4. My mother lives in my basement, and yes we drive one another completely crazy sometimes, but I try not to complain, since she's also a big help. I worry about her health.
5. I come from a small family, and I like them. I have one sister.
6. My father died when I was 19.
7. I first learned to knit when I was seven. I didn't pursue it much until around the age of 21, knit avidly and often for several years, then gave it up again from roughly 30 until this past summer.
8. Bliss was the one who got me started again, on socks. I'm grateful to her for the inspiration.
9. I had always wanted to learn to spin, but didn't take it up until I took a class in November.
10. I was really bad at being married.
11. I doubt I'll ever consider marrying again.
12. Sometimes I miss the companionship and the intimacy, but for the most part I'm far happier single.
13. From the righteous indignation expressed here on my blog, you'd think that my former husband was a completely worthless sack of shit, but he's a decent human being with a whole lot of issues I don't want inflicted on our son.
14. I don't really bear my ex-husband any ill will as long as he's good to B and stays out of my way.
15. I have issues of my own.
16. For instance, I think I'm much too emotional, and everyone around me would probably agree.
17. That's just the tip of the proverbial iceberg.
18. I like my job.
19. I have the best office in the building, on a corner.
20. I get extremely claustrophobic on airplanes. I'm crawling with a general anxiety and need to get OUT after a very short flight, but I'm not afraid of flying.
21. I love a good road trip.
22. I don't eat my vegetables with a few notable exceptions like spinach.
23. I blog a great deal, yet I leave out a lot of important details, and you really don't get a very good picture of what I'm actually like.
24. My sister could tell you what I'm really like, but I don't think she would out of consideration for her little sister.
25. We aren't twins, yet I believe she's the only person who really knows me.
26. I never felt that my husband knew me at all.
27. I have a lot of social anxiety that I cover pretty well most of the time.
28. I am addicted to gazing at the lovely things in the Spinning: Roving, Wool, Fiber category on eBay
29. My X used to complain that I always think I'm right, but why would you bother to argue about something if you didn't think you were right? Isn't that why people argue to begin with?
30. I am probably one of the very best procrastinators you will ever know.
31. I can't get through the day without four or five massive rationalizations.
32. I can play the piano and flute. (Flute much better than piano.)
33. My math skills are abyssmal, which is not always good for someone in the financial field.
34. The passwords I use for everything are all variations on a theme, otherwise I can't remember them.
35. People who try to break into my things or violate my privacy annoy me beyond all measure.
36. Smugness irritates me nearly as much.
37. I don't sleep well.
38. I don't like to be touched when I'm sleeping, although I will cut some slack to one of my cats, and he even gets on my nerves at times.
39. If I'm angry with you, I will usually lie and claim that I'm not until I'm so angry that I start screaming at you.
40. I fear my own anger. Not that I'm terribly destructive, but I tend to imagine it has a lot more power than it actually does.
41. I try very hard to think before I say something hurtful to someone else.
42. I remember unkind things others say to me forever.
43. I'm not particularly forgiving, although I will pretend to be in order to avoid a hassle.
44. I love my country, but am not patriotic by today's standards.
45. I should do more to support the causes I believe in.
46. I'm lazy.
47. No, extremely lazy. Which is what makes me a truly crappy housekeeper.
48. I don't mind doing the laundry, but am not allowed because the washer and dryer live in the basement with my mother, who doesn't like her space invaded.
49. I'm easy. Yes, in that way. But sex is largely meaningless to me because
50. I'm terrified of emotional intimacy.
51. If you act like you think you know me, I will pull away from you and not tell you why.
52. I've seen the same therapist on and off since I was 19.
53. Despite what you might think from reading this, she's done me a world of good.
54. I never try to change other people, although I will struggle mightily with acceptance of something I don't like about someone before ever reaching it.
55. The thing that causes me the most anxiety is a fear that Something Bad could happen to one of my children.
56. I do not tolerate violence
57. I'm confident that I could kill someone who hurt or threatened to hurt one of my children.
58. I don't think I could kill in my own self-defense.
59. I'm a good shot with a .22
60. I'm a decent shot at pool if I've have a bit of practice.
61. I will correct your grammar or try to give you a word when you're unable to think of one, and it irritated the living hell out of my ex-husband.
62. I was born blonde, but my natural hair color is a dull chestnut sort of brown with gray.
63. I don't color my hair now.
64. My hair has been everything from blonde to red to brown and all shades in that range.
65. My eyes are brown, too.
66. I'm fair skinned and have rosacea
67. I don't like the taste of coffee, but love the way it smells
68. I'm not a morning person.
69. I can tune out almost anything when I'm reading.
70. I don't like to make phone calls.
71. I am horribly rude to telemarketers.
72. I drive very sedately for a complete maniac.
73. I'm a backseat driver.
74. If you try to backseat drive while in my car, I will stop it and make you get out unless you're one of my family members and even then I will probably scream at you horribly.
75. I can be a huge pain in the ass.
76. If you criticize my parenting skills, you'd better know what you're talking about from direct experience and you'd better be prepared for a fight.
77. I very rarely ask for advice and I frequently don't listen to any advice I'm given, even if I've asked for it.
78. If you want my opinion, I will be honest but rarely brutal.
79. I cry easily, and I hate that about myself.
80. I speak some French, but am certainly far from fluent.
81. I laugh more easily than I cry and am quite goofy at times.
82. I think I'm funny even sometimes when it's clear I'm not.
82. I'm a smart-ass.
83. I'm very impatient with coyness or incoherence. Just say it.
84. I skirt issues, but don't mince words.
85. I avoid conflict.
86. I make a damned fine crab dip.
87. I have an extremely small bladder and am always running to the bathroom.
88. I'm a Virgo with none of the organizational skills that are supposed to go with it.
89. I don't always want to know the truth. If I'm ready for it, I'll ask for it.
90. I tend to be very intuitive, but this is more from wariness and observation than actual psychic ability.
91. I have accurately predicted the future for others.
92. The smell of chicken boiling in a pot for soup has made me feel ill since my first pregnancy.
93. My kids can always make me smile, even when things are really lousy.
94. Things are rarely as lousy as I tend to think they are.
95. In spite of that, I'm actually an optimist.
96. Perhaps denialist would be a more accurate description.
97. The car I have now is the first car I've ever bought without the help of a parent or husband.
98. I'm a much tougher negotiator than I ever reaized.
99. I learned that from my divorce, not from my car purchase.
100. I really had to push this to get to 100 and feel I've probably revealed things you either didn't want to know, already knew, or just plain don't care about and still not rendered an accurate self-portrait.